New Year is just around the corner and as it approaches, it’s normal for us to feel excited to start new and leave the old behind. With the new year comes new year’s resolutions to build healthy habits. But, according to one research conducted by Stava who analyzed data from 98.3 million uploaded exercise activities, the vast majority will quit by the 19th of January - hence they called it the “Quitter’s Day”. But, why do you think people fail? How come we get stuck and have difficulties in making a new habit stick, even with the abundance of information on exercise, nutrition and wellness in general?

I have always been interested in creating good habits and at the beginning of 2019 I started my 21-day challenge program aiming to embed one new habit every month: from running to strength training, drinking green smoothies, meditation, drinking 8 glasses of water a day, reading books and listening to an audiobook, etc. So I want to share with you some learnings from my experience and the books, articles, podcasts I have read/listened to on how to truly embed a new habit!

Why is it so difficult to build a new habit? Well, if you want to get very scientific, the basal ganglia which is a part of our brain keeps coming up on my research.

I hope I didn’t lose you there so let’s continue 😊. Why is it hard to build new habits?

1. You have no clear “WHY”.

2. The goals you are setting are unrealistic / You want to create too many habits at the same time

3. You rely too much on motivation.

4. You become impatient when you don’t see results right away.

How will you know your “WHY”? You need to be completely honest with yourself with regards to the reason why you want to create this habit by using the 7 levels deep exercise.

Example:

I want to build a habit of working out. WHY?

Because I want to fit in nice clothes. WHY?

Because I want to feel good about myself. WHY?

Because I want to look good when I start dating again. WHY?

Because I want to meet someone. WHY?

Because I want to have a family. WHY?

Because I don’t want to be alone.

It’s important to really know the reason why you are doing this so you can remind yourself if you feel like quitting. You can take this exercise by clicking on this link : http://www.7levelsdeep.com

Making unrealistic goals or too many new habits at the same time.

When we start out we get excited and get an “all or nothing mentality” which often leads us to become overwhelmed and quit.

Does this sound familiar to you?

· I want to run 5k, eat healthy and start meditation everyday.

· I want to work out 5x a week.

· I am going to read 1 book per week.

· I will never eat junk food and drink alcohol starting new year.

We set unrealistic goals and when we fail to do the habit one day because life can be unpredictable (example: getting sick, family coming over, traveling), we just quit.

Relying too much on motivation as it decreases overtime.

According to the “Mini Habits” book by Stephen Guise, the idea is to reduce the need for motivation and willpower by creating a small habit that is so easy you won’t even need both.

Examples:

· Read 1 page of a book every day.

· Do 1 push up every da.y

· Exercise for 7 minutes every day.

· Drink a glass of water when you wake up.

Motivation decreases over time, so if the habit is small it’s much easier to make it stick.

Also, don’t be put off by the small habit because even if you improve it 1% each day, the compound growth has incredible power.

Getting impatient when you don’t see the results.

Just when you feel like quitting, that’s when you need to focus and be more disciplined. When I feel like giving up, I always remind myself of the story Napoleon Hill talked about in his book, “Think and Grow Rich” which is “3 feet from gold”. A young man who quit after months of mining and not finding any gold. He sold the machinery to a junk man who then continued digging and found gold 3 feet from where the young man stopped. This applies to habit building; you don’t know you are “3 feet away” from what you want to achieve so be more patient.

So how do we build healthy habits?

The key is to understand the habit loop from the “Power of Habit” Book by Charles Duhigg and create a system.

Habit Loop mechanism:

This process within our brains is a three-step loop. First, there is a cue, a trigger that tells your brain to go into automatic mode and which habit to use. Then there is the routine, which can be physical or mental or emotional. Finally, there is a reward, which helps your brain figure out if this particular loop is worth remembering for the future:

Example:

Cue: Seeing the cookies

Routine: Eat the cookie

Reward: Sugar high

Cue: Bored

Routine: Check social media

Reward: Dopamine

Cue: After work

Routine: Go to the pub and drink beer

Reward: Socialize

Just being aware of the CUE can help us and is a key step to break the cycle of bad habit and replace it with sustainable healthy habits. Here is an example of a habit I have created recently.

When my baby goes for his first nap (cue), I put him in his pram to go for a walk outside (routine), which gives me time to listen to audiobooks or a podcast and get some fresh air. Grabbing coffee is also part of my routine (reward).

From - unhealthy habits:

When I finish work exhausted (cue), I go to the couch & watch Netflix with a bottle of beer (routine), which makes me forget about work (reward).

When I feel sleepy in the afternoon at work (cue), I drink soda (routine), which gives me a sugar boost and wakes me up (reward).

Being aware of the cue, we can train our brain to replace a bad habit with a healthy one. The cue and the reward can be similar, but we can swap the bad routine to a good routine.

To – healthy habits

When I finish work exhausted (cue), I put on my running gear and go for a run (routine), which makes me forget about work, gives me a runner’s high and more energy to spend time with my family (reward).

When I feel sleepy in the afternoon at work (cue), I drink black coffee and go for a 15-minute walk outside (routine) which gives me caffeine boost and wakes me up (reward).

You might tell me that it’s not that easy to swap bad habits to good habits…fair enough! In order to not go back to the bad habit, we need to create friction and make the good habit easier.

Example:

· Habit: I want to eat healthy snacks.

· Friction: Get rid of all junk food in your house so when you start craving for one before going to sleep, it would require you to get out of the house and go to the supermarket.

Instead have yoghurt, nuts and fruits readily available.

Now that you have a better understanding of how habit works, I will give you a summary and few more points to make the habit stick and keep the momentum.

1. Identify the healthy habit that you want to create and know your “WHY”. Visualise the benefits of being able to make this habit stick. How will this habit benefit you? How will it affect the people around you?

Tool: Create a visual reminder - it could be a vision board, a wallpaper on your phone, a picture you can post in your bathroom mirror or a thing you can carry and always see to remind you of your goal.

2. The hardest part is getting started that’s why we need to be motivated. Although motivation decreases overtime that’s why we need to set a realistic goal by starting with ONE SMALL habit at a time.

Tool: Have a habit tracker (either printed or an app on your phone) that you can tick everyday.

3. Be patient, results happen over time not overnight. Missing a day will not affect the habit formation, you just need to get back on track and be consistent.

4. One thing I will add is the importance of accountability in forming new habits:

Announcing your goal on your social media account.
Have an accountability partner.
Doing it with a friend, family or group for support as well.
Lastly, get a coach for accountability and to get support and guidance.

On 1-on-1 coaching with me, I will be using different tools to get clarity on what you want, stay on track, to discover any obstacles, barriers or limiting belief that can hold you back, start exploring options, give you information, create small actionable steps towards it and be here to support, empower, keep you focused and cheer you on.

How to create sustainable healthy habits?

5-Minute Plank Challenge